Dream

lay down take a breath..

noones here to count your steps

im here to hold your head as you fall asleep

nothing else around but the echo of my voice as i speak

softly and loud enough for you to hear me.

I watch your eyes closed, knowing your far from me.

My hand holding your hand, 

I will never be far away. 

the smoke clears eventually, and grass will eventually grow

How long it takes usually varies, this time I don't know.

I wont leave you to fend by yourself.

Let me help you separate you from everyone else.

you shouldn't have to worry about that.

You do.

I see the white flags growing from your sideburns.

Dont give up.

Take a deep breath. 

I am not your enemy.

I am your partner against this war

Let me in.

Dont fight me.

Lets fight them. 

Just start by waking up from your nightmare

realize I'm part of the dream. 

Disapointments....

Coming from myself, It is something I had become familiar with. Never In my life did anything I want, go to plan. I always had to alter it and change it to conform to people around me. When I got sick, I didn't have  say. I didn't decide I wanted to quit school and working and being a normal 18 year old. I didn't have a decision what so ever on that one. Every step and move I made for 2 and half years during my chemotherapy treatments, was dictated by a doctor or a nurse. I did make the decision to move to San Diego, which ended up shaping my life and my personality into what I am today. I made the decision to come home from San Diego, to take care of my mother, whom spent every day and second with me when I was sick. I figured its in my and her best interest for me to be home, rather than her freaking out every second me not being home. I sacrificed my lifestyle and the direction my life was going for my mother. I do not regret anything in life. But I am very disappointed in how my life is going now. If it weren't for the book, I do not know where I would be headed. With the idea I have in my mind, to help other cancer patients in their battle, with the book, that is fueling the fire... I am very excited about the book. Maybe it will take me back to San Diego, where I really am supposed to be.

driving home at 2am...

Passing old exits on the Southern St. Just brings back old memories. As my girlfriend is keeping me up with texts, I can't help but to remember good and bad memories. I loved long island. But so many painful memories stemmed from when I was sick. Earlier in the night, I drove past my old house and I got shivers down my spine. That was where it all began. That sidewalk I walked on my way to work, then back realizing something was definitely wrong in my body... Hurts to think of it sometimes. Not going to lie...

Remembering back...

4 and half years ago, around this time, I had started to become real sick. I remember getting really congested and run down. I had just finished my first semester of college. I did pretty well. I got a 3.5, and learned a lot about the basics of culinary sanitation and knife skills. I got to the point of realizing that I wanted to become a front of the house manager rather than behind the line. New Years was coming up and we were going to start at Meister's house and from there we went to Rich's. A bunch of us were going to get together. I loved getting everyone together. Here's a couple pictures from the Summer and Winter before I was diagnosed.

Merry Christmas!

Everyone in My life, please be safe and enjoy the time with your family.

Love you all, 

Merry Christmas

Mikey NY

NJ drivers...

Stop Texting while driving. I am a victim of this.. however, I know when to stop when a car infront of me is. This girl didn't. I was sitting in line at a red light. I am looking in my rear mirror at a girl driving with her head faced down, the car still moving. I got hit. Her airbags shot open and her windshield cracked... mine, little crack. Karma

return from San Diego,

After being stranded in San Francisco Airport, since arriving at 12:27pm, pinching myself realizing I'm sitting in my computer chair. Not the floor next to gate 85 watching thousands of people pass by. My life consisted of a bottle of Power C Vitamin water, my Ipod and my blackberry. I knew noone but my girlfriend and my dad who kept me busy with consistent vibrating ringtones. Looking across to my right beyond the moving sidewalk, a line of about 150 people trying to figure out what their next move was. I picked a good spot to sit, the departure screen was right in front of me, the bathroom was less than 10 feet to my left. I had my phone charging, my life line to my life charging, and my far left was a bar. My life was simple. I felt homeless. Living off of what I had on me. I was lonely but content. Couldn't stop thinking about how I wanted to improve my life and the thought of seeing my family and my girlfriend. Cancer is such an imposing thought that used to be in the front of my mind and overtaking my life, nowadays the thought is in the back of my mind. I think of it from time to time, pinching myself making sure I actually am living. Such a thought. Feels amazing to look back on it sometimes...

Book Update,

I have decided with my cancer memoir, to go the direction of self publishing, I want to have more of an intimate connection with the book. Having complete control of the book, I could place the kinda of effort I would want from my efforts on the idea of marketing and spreading the word...

Hoping for the best...

your thoughts.

Updated Hair Pics!

My Hair is now about a 1/4 of an inch and I am actually starting to like it. Kinda have a receding hairline, but its all good.  

GROWING HAIR

Hey, so yeah I am in the process of growing hair, believe it or not. My intentions is eventually grow it to 10 inches, to donate to www.locksoflove.org !

First month:

CANCER TOUR

Hey, starting next week I will be visiting everyday, a new hospital/support group. This is kicking off the first part of my Cancer Tour. In the next couple weeks, I intend to create Hats/socks, to donate to young cancer patients at these support groups/hospitals that I visit. I am in the process in creating a website, that is going to be " www.survivingcancersurvivinganything.org". On the site, will be information and details regarding the tour. 

Looking forward to visiting those kids...

Mike

A couple pics, when I first left the hospital...

Introduction

Hey, I'm Mike Cohen, and I'm alive and kickin'. Kicking hard. Some take that statement for granted but for me its surprising, its surprising that it's almost the end of 2008. It's surprising that it's been almost five years since I was diagnosed with A.L.L. (Cancer of the bone marrow). I was 18 years old at the time, and living as anyone else about to enter college... I was just having fun.

Following my diagnosis, I dealt with chemotherapy treatments, bone marrow biopsies and spinal taps. In the

 middle of my treatments and procedures, I went to the Emergency Room for a routine checkup... it turned out that I had pneumonia, congestive heart failure and pulmonary embolism, all due to complications with my chemotherapy.  As if chemo

wasn't enough, I had to deal with these side effects, but it was my mission to overcome such adversities. 

At the end of my chemotherapy treatments, I decided to continue my goal of going to college. I decided to move from the East Coast (New York) to the other side of the country. I figured that since I was able to breathe and walk, why not move to a place where i dreamed of living my entire life? Going against what my family and doctors advised, I wanted to start over and create a new and cancer-free life. Why should I let my past experiences with cancer stop my dreams? I didn't let it, cancer had controlled my life for long enough. 

So now looking back, I realize how lucky and how hard I worked to be here today. I decided to share my story with anyone who might be interested, and even more importantly, any of you who have experienced or are experiencing a similar burden.

Another Blog for you to check out...